just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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