You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
