there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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