OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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