I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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