Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
