So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
the day after is always just damage control
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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