I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
