i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize