Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
