We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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