at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I had to cum in my sink.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
