My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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