In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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