weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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