I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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