Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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