quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
my sisters under your porch take her home
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
