I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
