Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
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And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
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.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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