it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
