I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
