Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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