Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize
