we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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