its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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