is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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