a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize