is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
They have beer where we have blood.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
