That's intense
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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