i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
