Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
