I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize