I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize