No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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