i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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