Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
