So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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