Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I want you more than these girls want KFC
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset