redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
