He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
