Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
