Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
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