I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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