Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
