I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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