she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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