I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
