It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
They have beer where we have blood.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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