if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
